Life is stressful and for me at least, everyday I have a lesson of patience. It is a gift that I was not born with and I wish that I was because it is a daily struggle. I am a goal oriented and task driven person; I’m always writing out timelines and basically my 5 year plan. For everything that I do, I have an idea of when things should be happening and how they should be moving along. If they’re not moving along or moving as quickly as I would like I get incredibly stressed, anxious and upset with myself.
Honestly, it get’s to the point where I’m incredibly upset and disappointed in myself and I drive myself crazy. Some days I wonder how my fiance puts up with all the crazy. All of these negative emotions aren’t great at all and end up being a bigger hindrance for whatever my goal may be. Conor on the other hand has much more patience and a calmness built into him. If something is taking longer than normal or he isn’t seeing results, he just waits. He doesn’t typically get overwhelmed with negative emotions.
As a child I was always told “Patience is a virtue” but I never truly understood it and what it meant until recently. Having a virtue is something that people regard as a positive characteristic and patience is one of them. But why? To be patient it means accepting things as they come, not getting upset or frustrated over them not moving along as you would like. I get so caught up in the end goal that I lose sight of what I’ve learned along the journey and I would barely spend a moment celebrating my achievements because I would be so caught up with the small failures of my journey. Reflecting on this I realized that in a lot of things that I do, I lose a lot of joy because I’m so stuck on this one vision rather than looking at the whole picture which includes how I got there. “The Journey is the Destination” I keep trying to remind myself and some days it helps others I have to try harder.
I want to be a patient person, I want to enjoy the journey and just accept life as it comes. Patience requires practice, every single day. It isn’t easy and it’s a way to grow into a better person daily. Some days I’m so scared to face the fears I have in my journey and I’m afraid to accept hiccups and failures but it’s a part of becoming stronger and living life. Slowly I’ve developed ways to better practice patience and here’s what I do:
Breathe // When I get anxious sometimes I don’t even realize that I’m holding my breathe. So I force myself to stand up of sit down and just take 5 minutes to myself and breathe through my fears and frustrations.
Yoga// Developing a consistent practice has forced me to take time to reflect on what progress means and how to accept being perfectly imperfect.
Let It Go// Go ahead start singing but I’m serious, let it go has been a mantra of mine since I was a junior in high school thanks to a lesson my dad taught me. Let it all go and just let things happen on their own. Let go of the obsession.
Look at the Big Picture// I try to remind myself that the big picture also includes the journey, not just the destination.
Whether it’s recovery from my eating disorder, waiting side by side with Conor to hear about MedSchool or even doing anything on this blog, it will be a perfect time for me to practice my patience. One thing that I hope to start adopting is going into my bible when I’m feeling particularly challenged by my lack of patience. Let me know what you do to keep patience or practice it daily!
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Romans 12:12